On request of Mushtaq Mehmood I have choosen this topic. I believe if we can understand & develop leadership qualities within ourselves this would entail a happier & productive life. Based on the significance of the topic I have decided to do a three part series. I’ll try to make the process and the acquisition of these skill as easy as it could be… so that everyone could follow through …  and acquire these skills for a better future …   

Part # 1- Leadership – Understanding the Basics. 

Part # 2 – How to become a leader. (Activities / Games / Habits)  

So without wasting time lets dive into learning what actually is leadership:  as per text book definition its ;

 ” A process that influences other people to achieve an objective and guides the company in a way to make it more coherent and cohesive is called leadership. “

or

 “process of social influence in which one person can enlist the aid and support of others in the accomplishment of a common task.”

Now those definitions are pretty much correct. But for me .. leadership means one thing “Inspiring others”  and like most of the skills this needs constant practice, refining & tweaking.

 Now if a leader has to force you to do something then he definatly lacks leadership skill.

The question might arise why do we need to learn about leadership. Well in todays world, we have many followers but not that many leaders … Now this is an oppertunity. Yes we have a unlimited supply of Team leaders, Group Leaders etc etc .. but truely ask yourself if you were part of any such team, did they inspire you … 90 % of the time the answer would be “NO” you had to follow them because of the position they were put in and vice versa ….

Having this quality can differntiate you from the rest of the group !!! I very good quote needs to be mentioned here :

 Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men — the other 999 follow women.  – Groucho Marx

  

 Reason I mentioned this because its actually true , that one person who posses leadership quality is one amongst not 999 , its 999999 (population have increase I guess since that quote was said )  and this quality shows , radiates from your every word , from your every gesture , from your actions and speech, goals, vision.  If you have it … then that is all you need to get to the top.

I can’t emphisis more on the need to develop this skill … and know this , its very much acquireable .. many says that leaders are born , well I won’t agree here … for me I am more of a believer that ” LEADERS ARE MADE ” and if you have the will then you can be a leaders too …

Let me end this article with this quote :

‎”Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”  

 So what you’ve done in your life before this moment , you can’t change that … but what you do now onwardsd will change & shape your life to come … so take action ….

 If you have any topic on which you want me to write about (has to be personal development / self improvement or related) do let me know I have the time & will to share my thoughts and research to make it more informative.

To your success ….

- Tirmizi

I always share my personal experience , my journey cause its basically journey of an average or below average skilled and education wise individual towards a better position .. so most could relate to it and see that whatever I’ve discuss is very much possible , as I have done it so I believe anybody else can too ..  

 Now if I have to choose top skills that has helped in changing my life my thinking then , the most important has been ” Reading & Researching “

 I was like most of the Pakistani people who hate to read , I never read even the novels or “umru aiyaar ke kahaniyaan as a kid” you can say without reading you are kinda LOST .. or its like your own brain you are using .. but with reading you are basically borrowing brains of all the folks around you on the given subject, benefit from their earlier work …

 So this quick note is to let you know if you develop the habit of reading , seems really difficult or weired or kids stuff … but if you do it .. research things .. you’ll see there has been so much work already done on almost every subject , and things have been made so simple , but we just don’t know them .. and you could be doing things alot better if you knew those traits …. those rare secrets that the PLAYERS / GURUS are using ..

 so if you’ve got any problem then easier is just go to google , and research the answer , most often then not you’ll find the answer , tips etc …

 Now once you’ve that habit developed , you’ll be paying more attention to my notes too .. just kidding … just want you guys to go out and find the answers and not just remain confused or doing things the old school way … take benefit from other’s work .. they have done the hard work all you need to do is replicate , no need to reinvent the wheel ..

THE BOTTOM LINE IS SUCESSS IS NOT SOME COLLECTION OF SUPER POWERS , ITS THE COMBINATION OF THESE SMALL HABITS …. SO I HOPE YOU’D REALISE THE SIGNIFICANCE OF THESE AND TRY TO DEVELOP THESE MORE … OR PAY MORE ATTENTION ON THESE SKILLS …..

To your success …

- Tirmizi   |    First Pakistani blogger with a Pakistani Vlog

Initially when I started writing on this topic of motivation, it was not intended to be a two part thing , but motivation is something that we get and lose pretty easily. So it was imperitive to understand what are the factors which result in demotivation… 

Now lets talk about the system of staying motivated, this is not any hard and fast rule but something that I have tried and tested and worked so I am sharing so perhaps someone out there could also benefit.

Step # 1  Define your dream / want / goal :

Now at times we just spend life without clearly knowing what we really want. Yes momentarily things come up like jobs, cars , gadgets etc , but those are the things they just come and go or something new comes up .. so there is nothing static in your mind to fight for or aim for on day to day basis .. so think about this , it could be any materialistic thing , any position etc, but that has to mean the most for you …

Step # 2 Reverse Engineer :

This is most important to simplify or creating a road map for you so you’ll know exactly what steps are needed. Remember when we were kids , there were those puzzles where you’ve to take the object to its destination, so the cheat or easiest way was to start from the end point and move back towards the starting , so this works the same way .. know what you want ultimatly and then start thinking , what you might need to get their … Now this could be a J-O-B , any object anything ….. let me give you my real life example ..

While I was working in a newspaper was tired of that job and since then I wanted to do JOB in Mobilink. So that was an ultimate goal for me … so then I did this reverse engineering thingi …

Goal Mobilink

I needed ;

1. Good Communication Skills.
2. Strong Personality.
3. Good on paper / CV.
4. Networking (though that was not on agenda at that time but now the way things are I would suggest you guys to do that too as its fairly easy via the new virtual world of social networking sites.

Now me having a very ordinary educational background , and insufficient experience , I knew those are the areas I can’t change , but I have to overcome them by other things that I can change .. so above become my list … cause I knew in my heart that If I have those things then I’ll have that JOB in Mobilink. 

What this excercise does is it breaks down the bigger objective into smaller sub objectives , which are inline with the bigger one …

Step # 3 : Breaking down the sub task to daily activities level:

Now in order to achieve those sub task , start thinking about what small activities you need to perform in order to achieve that skill / goal … 

Like for communication skills : (and let me assure you my english langugage was very misrable in those days )

So I though this is what I’ll do …

1- Read 1 page of english newspaper each day.

2- Speak english with some friend (now this is you have to find some like minded person who might be interested in this too otherwise rest will just make fun of you) or family if this could happen.

3- Watch an english movie (this was easy)

anwyays you ge the idea, so I did these things and other relevant things .. Now doing these fully or even partially gave me full satisfaction that I am working towards my bigger objective.

Right Mindset :

Stay positive and know it in your heart that you will be able to achieve the target , remind that yourself, write down your target and put that on the wall or in your room somewhere , where you’ll be reminded of your target all the time ….

Now this is important , don’t be too hard on yourself , to plan every min , cause its life , you’ll get all kind of surprises daily , things that you didn’t forsee , which might consume your time … so plan your time accordingly , keep some time for unplanned activities. And many a time you won’t be able to work on your tasks , anticipate that this might happen and its ok , so you won’t be demotivated that you’ve stopped working etc .. cause if you knew their would be days like this , then this won’t break the habit.

In the end make sure you are having fun !!! cause without having fun , it would just turn into work or some kinda burdon .. so enjoy what you are doing , that will make the pace of progress alot faster ….

I hope these tips or steps would help you , I tried to make the whole process as simple so that anybody could replicate and take benefit from this …

In the end , be vocal , share your feedback as comments , cause collectively we can refine these things and eventually help many.

=============

EDITED: IMPORTANT ADDITION BY KAMRAN SULTAN SAHAB … PLEASE READ THIS IT WOULD REALLY HELP YOU TAKE MY WORD FOR IT ..

For those who are using this, I am just adding a bit of NLP to Syed Tirmizi’s words. I hope this helps some readers.

There are certain conditions for making your goals happen. 

1. Be SPECIFIC and think of what you do you want. …Many people think of what they do not want e.g. I do not want financial troubles. The problems is the word NOT is not processed in the unconscious and when people think of what they do not want they program their brains to focus on what they do not want (e.g. financial problems). And remember what you focus on you will experience. 

2. Make sure you OWN it. In other words a goal is something that YOU WANT instead of what someone else suggested you should want. 

3. It is ACHIEVABLE now. You know what no matter how positive I may think, at my present age I just can not fight a heavy weight boxer. So how can you say it is achievable, if there are people like you, your age, your education etc are doing it YOU CAN DO IT too. 

4. Consider the EFFECTS in your life and life of those around you. No matter what changes you make there will be some effects, are they acceptable to you? Will everyone involved benefit in some way? How will this goal impact the world at large? 

5. Have a dead line for achievement. A goal must have a certain dead line, or its only a wish. This is also important because the goal may not be worth the effort in some situations. 

6. What can go wrong and what will you do if it goes wrong?Things won’t be smooth just because you have set a goal. There will be challenges. Plan ahead, what if something goes wrong. How will you handle it. What if your PLAN A does not work, what will be your PLAN B and PLAN C. 

Most people quit when they face challenges, but when you have planned for it you will be ready to move on and on. 

Now when you have made it, Here is how you can install your goal in your unconscious mind so that you keep working towards it with least effort. 

When you have finished WRITING your goal. 

1. Imagine what it will be like to have it achieved. Imagine AS IF you already have it. Make a BIG bright colorful image in your mind. See it as a movie of your successful achievement. Add Sounds you expect to be hearing, (Pretend if you must) and Feel the feelings you will be feeling when you will have it. 

2. Step out of the image and place it in your future right on the date when you want it to happen. 

3. From then on every time you think of your goal, think of it AS IF its already done. 

I hope this helps…See More 

To your success ….

- Tirmizi

Life is full of distractions .. These distractions at times take us away from what we actually want or our dreams. Now dreams too the word (in a country like Pakistan where seemingly people feel that there aren’t that many oppertunities) sometimes seem unreal. But believe me they can come true provided you back up your dreams with a plan. Without that systematic plan of action those dream will remain dreams unless Allah has a miracle plan to reward you  ….. However, the general rule of thumb is Allah helps those who helps themselves …

Now when I was talking about systematic plan , that can help you achieve your dreams … and keep you motivated.

Before we go into the details of how to motivate yourself, this would rather become a long write-up ,  in this part 1 lets discuss what are the things that basically demotivates us ..

1-  Unreal Wants / Dreams.

2-  Present resources.

3-  No results.

4-  Peer pressure.

5-  Habit of giving up ….

Now without spending too much time on explaining them … let me quickly go through those so you can get an idea .. unreal wants (well to be honest if you ask me there is nothing that could be unreal provided you are committed and dedicated proportionally to make that dream / want to come into reality) are stuff that you might think is not possible and eventually you never persue that specific dream.

Sometimes the current resources prove a big barrier for you to start your journey towards your dreams / wants. but I’ll discuss in more details that what you have is sufficient.

Then even if you start your journey but after sometimes you don’t see things happening you tend to stop or get demotivated … then you have friends & family who at times are not supportive of your ideas or dreams and they try to force the so called reality to your face … so that again is one factor that stops you from persuing your dreams ..

And in the end this is a very normal factor that stops us from making our dreams come true … that is our habit of leaving things or stopping at things … Now its this habit that can sky rocket your chances of achieving your goals / dreams , now decide whenever you want to do anything be it big or small .. make a commitment to yourself that I will do it … and once you do it successfully , then you’ll get the additional motivation that what you plan to do you have the power to make that happen … So once you start achieving a few tasks , then you’ll realize the power and hidden potential that you had ….

In the next part of this motivation system , i’ll discus what is the system that you should pick up .. and how that could help in bringing your dreams into reality …

Do share your thoughts , be voacal , caues that is the first thing I did when I started my journey … and I still follow that ….. discuss stuff , ask questions … don’t just leave things or question marks in your heart ..

To your success …

- Tirmizi

 If you are like me , you have got your head stucked into too many things , or even if you don’t have that many things in your mind …

YOU CAN STILL BE FAR MORE PRODUCTIVE THEN WHAT YOU ALREADY ARE

  Now everyday one can wake up thinking , Ahhh shit , today I have to go through the same old shit again .. or you can plan the day before and know exactly what to expect the next morning , so you can save yourself from that ugly surprise (which actually is not a surprise) but many of the working class they sleep @ night thinking that the rest won’t end ever .. and when they wake up the next day .. its an ugly recurrance ..

Anyways … my point is that a day specially in winter season is already very small … and with those few hours … we need to make most of it …  This also holds more significance if you are like 95 % of educated class who are doing some kinda J-O-B …  cause after work one feels very tired and assumes that he’s productive hours are over and the reamaining time he / she would rest …

But the real question to ask yourself … is

THE TIME YOU SPENT IN OFFICE WAS THAT PRODUCTIVE FOR YOU OR FOR THE EMPLOYER !!!

This used to be my motivation when I was working … coming back from a hard day , and then starting over with my own personal productive time ….

Now how to go about making your day and tomorrow more productive … well this might sound bit text book type .. but if you follow this , you’ll see how productive your day could be and how unplanned your life has been earlier ….

well all you need to do is write on a peice of paper ..

Today

Task # 1  (important ) (not urgent)

Task # 2  (important ) (not urgent)

Task # 3 (important ) (not urgent)

Task # 4 (important ) (not urgent)

Tomorrow

Task # 1  (important ) (not urgent)

Task # 2  (important ) (not urgent)

Task # 3 (important ) (not urgent)

Task # 4 (important ) (not urgent)

Now keep this peice of paper at a place where you could be watching it , or where it woudl stay in front of you …….. Keep track of your tasks .. which are done and which are not .. if you follow this tip for a few days , infact for just one day , you’ll realise that how much productive day you just had …

To your success …

- Tirmizi

http://www.facebook.com/tirmizee

I remember a couple of years ago after college when I started with my first job … things seemed really great , and I always had the habit of looking at the bigger picture , like my first job was of Rs. 2,500 and for me it was a big deal , though the employer that I used to work for used to take work like crazy and eventually I used to end up paying Rs. 3,000 just in petrol etc .. but I was always calculating like , if I am earning Rs. 2,500 a month that means I am earning 30 K a year … hmmm ! thats nice ..

BUT VERY SOON REALITY BITES HARD … AND YOUR DREAM WORLD COMES CRASHING DOWN …

you are in the market and you see and meet other people who are earning alot more then what you are earning in a year etc .. who have much better facilities etc etc … 

Now … at this point you’ve got two options …

1- To stay in your current situation and curse the world and Lord for his injustice …

2- To take up the challange and change your situation.

So the reason of me writing this note was basically as I was writing today’s plan , so I though to share with you guys, that with little planning , just sitting down thinking , prioritizing , orginizing you can change your life …

I made my journey from Rs. 2,500 to (well I don’t want to brag, but its purely unlimited plus I get to do whatever I want to do …) just because I choose to take up the challange and change my situation …

So plan your life so that you’d be spending it on your own terms and not the other way around. I wish and hope that you guys have a prospereous life ahead …

I get so much inspiration and motivation from the real life positive stories of individuals , similar quotes , sayings …. so do share positive stuff, stories , quotes  all around .. you might never know , when and where you might be changing somebody’s LIFE …

And to do me a favor , if you have any positive story to share or quote etc , do share it here or keep sharing it with me … cause I am always interested …

Tirmizi 

http://www.facebook.com/tirmizee

So as I promised myself to take a some relief goods to the flooded areas in Pakistan so with Allah’s and people’s support we at TAG (Tirmizi Action Group) managed to do that. With our teams special efforts we managed to collect over 2,10,000 Rs. worth donations and over 900 Cloths.  I thank those who contributed and trusted me with there money from the bottom of my heart.

on 22 Aug 2010 Sunday we took the relief supplies with this and went to Charsada along with a medical team from Islamic Medical College that was headed by Dr. Mauz Iqbal.

Now we reached Charsada Interchange and right at the edge of Motorway there were a few tents and kids started gathering around the relief truck and started asking for goods. We stood there for a while in order to regroup, but none was going to distribute anything to those guys.

After getting together we moved towards the flooded areas in Charsada (for pictures you can check floods in pakistan charsada ). Now the medical team had some point decided where they were going to hold the camp and destribute the goods. Upon reaching that place I saw that the extent of damage in that place was not that much, 1-2 houses damaged rest everything was pretty much back to normal.

I asked them that I am not satisfied and won’t be distributing the relief goods to these people, that many other families might be in more need and waiting for this.  The langugage barrier proved fatal as we were not able to understand them (phatans / phustu speakers) and they were not able to understand us. However, we started visiting village after village , asking people in the way but everybody was misguiding, reason being that they wanted us to give or distribute the relief goods in their areas.

After a few hours search we were able to find a nice guy who told us that these places haven’t suffered much , the villages near the river are the most effected and the people living there haven’t recieved much aid as nobody bothers to go to those places. We requested him to join us and fortunatly he agreed and we started our journy towards those places.

After an hour of traveling we reach the village tarnaf that was almost wiped off by the flood. All the houses damaged and people were forced to live in tents. Tents were also very short in numbers so in one tent we saw multiple families. 

We distributed the relief goods to them, the colony consisted of 48 tents, after distributing goods here we went to two other camps before coming back home. We reached back home at 1:00 am but all were over satisfied with the efforts and results.

Now the reason for me to share all this was to guide or warn about the problems that could be faced.

Good :

1. I love the fact that people specially youth is so receptive about the whole thing and are participating by all means.
2. People instead of fighting or differences are coming together for one cause.
3. Youth has felt the responsibility and many are taking action.

Bad:

1. Many of us we still don’t contribute or participate because of trust deficit.
2. Many of us make excuses that we have given already. With the damage of such magnitude no matter how much you could give still there would be need for more .. so be generous give out as much as you can or as little as you can, but keep giving.
3. Large number of audience they want to do something but don’t know what to do or how to contribute and end up doing nothing.

UGLY:

1. Because of the relief goods are free and with prevailing inflation, many of the poor class has started to pose as affected and started collecting relief goods. I saw many camps right outside the Charsada Interchange and on investigation and research I found out that those are normal guys who now just got hold of a tent and moved here and are now collecting relief aid from every passing truck. Those are not flood affecties but normal poor class and street beggers.
2. The relief goods that is collected , packed and transpoted but still most of it doesn’t end up with deserving people. Many of the convoys carrying the goods when they reach the effected city they come across some tents or people who pose as needy and flood effected , so these guys distribute the relief goods to them, without much research. The need is to research a bit move about in the effected area , preferabally move away from the city into villages cause those are the areas where not many focus so deliver the goods to them. Everybody would misguide in hopes that the relief goods would be distributed in there region , but responsibility would fall on the guys who are managing these convoys.

I hope we could help our brothers and sisters in need and end there sorrows.  Know it the destruction of such magnitude the situation won’t improve in matter of weeks it would take months to rebuild, so in that time you have to keep sharing and contributing as much as you could.

In my next post I will write about how easy it could be to help !!!! The solution is in front of us if only we want to see ..

- Tirmizi 

So as part of my relief efforts for the floods in Pakistan we started gathering donations , goods and expanding the team.  My concern was that, destruction so big won’t be controlled in next weeks or even months. We need to keep working and supporting our people who have been effected.

Although we can’t remove the marks that this flood had made on their lives, but we can help in easing the pain by just being with them , showing that they are not alone. Anyways, me and few local members of my team we started collecting funds. The process included first to go through things / stuff from our own home bringing that, then asking family & relatives to contribute and finally moving to door to door , mosque to mosque and then on road.

The reason I am writing this post is because of what we experienced while we started collection of funds on the road. On Friday 20 August 2010 after the Jumaah Prayer we members of TAG decided to go to Karal Chowk (thats the road that goes to the Airport) and ask for donations to the cars that stand on the traffic signals. Now its Ramazan and all of us were fasting and with the heat of the sun it was not an easy task to be doing. However, we all were very motivated and with the positive cause in mind there was no turning back.

After an hour or so of collecting funds the Police Mobile came in and they captured me and a few members of my team like we were selling drugs or something. Anyways, they brought us to the Police Station Karal where the attitude of the Police was so phthatic. I asked them whats wrong , and that we are doing this for the Flood Victims and this is our responsibility as humans and Pakistani’s but that I guess was not making sense to them. I was also surprised to see this sort of action cause if you see there are loads of beggers on these signals who make the life of common commuters difficult but this police won’t do much about those. Yes for the guys who will sacrifice there own comforts and come out in such hard conditions (Roza & Heat of the afternoon) they will stop them, instead of appreciating or supporting they will use abusive language and show abusive attitude to them.

Anyways this was not going to stop me. Those Jahil’s were never going to listen to the logic or reasons. So we had to deal them in a manner which they are used too. I called a few friends namely Saad Muddasir whose in APP told him about the situation , he immediatly called the IG office and the PRO from there called the Karal Police Station and told them to release us.  I wish I had a camera so I could capture this whole episode and send it to GEO TV that would have made them think twice before stopping any positive action.

Anyways, the flood relief efforts continued (do check flood in pakistan pictures to get an idea about the massive destruction that these floods had in Pakistan) and we are on our way to Supplies ( Food items, Clothing, Medicines) and Medical Camp orginized by Doctors and students of Rawalpindi Medical College. In just a few days we have managed to gather funds and goods beyond our expectations. So this proves that we still have some humanity left !!! and then there will always be JAHIL’s to stop your path.

- Tirmizi

So I tried to stay unconcerned I tried to stay dead !!! but I still hear there cries and I still feel there pain !! So can’t bear this anymore , will be going to the flooded areas to play my part and help in the relief efforts !!!

Haven’t decided on the date when i’ll go but will be within this week. This would be my first visit so besides the obvisous I need your help in understanding the situation and preparing accordingly.

Just had a dicussion with a group of guys who are @ Nowshera (RT Usman Khan and friends) about what are the basic needs of the people and atm , they need everything !!!! So its good & unfortunate .. good in a sense we all can contribute with something … look around within our houses see things that we can spare, there’s always something … be generous and believe me you all will be doing this for yourself…..

Here’s what my initial plan is for the stuff that I would take to these areas:

 

Eatables

Cloths

Medicine (just got the list of most common medicine needed in flooded area’s situation)

Financial Support (Just to be on the safe side as I have no idea what I’llc ome across when I’d reach there)

Now I hate asking for contributions or donations but the devastation is so much and I feel that it would be difficult for me to manage things by myself , and by myself it doesn’t mean that I am alone in this.. I have plans to talk to all my relatives , my friends , neighbors and will be going door to door to collect things from our society. Which I am confident that we’ll have more then sufficient that we can manage … but the NEED is alot more then that unfortunatly …

So if you have any suggestions , if you feel like there is some way you can contribute then do feel free to contact me via pm here , you can call me my number is on the profile page … or email me @ asktirmizi@live.com

I have always believed and still do in the power of people .. if we all come together for one cause , then we don’t need any government’s help be it our own or external aid …

May Allah help those who are already fighting for this cause .. and may Allah gives the courege to those who are waiting for the help to arive and keep them safe…

Ameen ,

- Tirmizi

Pakistan unfortunatly is going through toughest time since its independance. I don’t just say this based on the corruption and inflation, electricity situation. But it feels like we have made Allah angry too … cause we are getting into one predicament and then the effects of those are not over then something else hits us !!!

Right now the flood situation in Pakistan is just something nobody forsaw …. I was reading the news and it said that the impact and devastation of this flood is more then the Great Sunami that hit India,  Sri Lanka and so on ….

I just wish and hope that may Allah in this blessed month of Ramzan forgives our sins and blesses us with courage and faith so that we could get ourselves out of all the problems that we are currently facing.

May Allah gives strength to all those too who are working day and night physically, financially and morally to help the victims of the recent floods in Pakistan.

Finally May this Ramzan changes us for the better.

Ameen

Pakistan Zindabad

- Tirmizi